I feel unhinged because it happened again.
You were supposed to be different. All shimmery and glowing with positive energy. You made me believe that my other friends were full of negativity. And maybe I wanted to believe that so I did.
But this isn’t about that. This is about the fact that I should be available for you whenever you want.
But when I need something you just say a simple word: No. You’re busy, you’re sleeping, you just don’t want to. Why don’t I have those options? You literally drag me and beg me to do the things you want.
And if I ever say no, you don’t hesitate to label me. You say I don’t take risks. Well fuck you. Because I took a risk with you. I gave you my time. I eliminated my own space for you. All the times I wanted to tell you to please go away because I wanted to do other things, I DID NOT.
And I became dependent. You got possessive when I talked to other people or hung out with them to the level that I freaked out. I wanted to break free.
And I stayed. Because I believed in the goodness of your heart.
You’re sly is what you are. The innocent child, the person who is too childish. I know who you are.